Eau de Toilette/Fish/Never Give a Sucker... (Storycuts)

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Summary

In 'Eau de Toilette', in her boudoir Madame, a famous eighteenth-century French beauty of dubious hygiene habits, awaits, en déshabillée, the hot water for her six-monthly bath. Will it help to return Monseigneur de Rochefort, her favourite admirer, back to her side?

In 'Fish', Melissa and Jack are on their honeymoon in Naples, but things aren't going well between them. He longs to explore the sensuous riches of Neapolitan food, but she is a lactose-intolerant, wheat-allergic vegetarian, and has objections to every restaurant. Jack finally entices her to Casa Rosa, a small fish restaurant down by the harbour, but there the battle between food and love will really begin...

In 'Never Give a Sucker...', Reggie Noakes was a vampire for seventy-five years, but he doesn't fit in any more, ousted by market forces. You're just the wrong kind of vampire, they tell him. He never liked blood that much anyway, it's a bugger trying to get any when you're fat and balding and no virgin would look at you twice.

Part of the Storycuts series, these short stories were previously published in the collection Jigs & Reels.

About the author

Joanne Harris

Joanne Harris is the internationally renowned and award-winning author of over twenty novels. Her Whitbread-shortlisted novel Chocolat was adapted to the screen, starring Juliette Binoche and Johnny Depp. She is the author of several other bestsellers, including The Lollipop Shoes, Peaches for Monsieur Le Curé and The Strawberry Thief. She has also written acclaimed novels in such diverse genres as fantasy based on Norse myth (Runemarks, Runelight, The Gospel of Loki), and the Malbry cycle of dark psychological thrillers (Gentlemen & Players, Blueeyedboy, and Different Class).

Born in Barnsley, of an English father and a French mother, she spent fifteen years as a teacher before (somewhat reluctantly) becoming a full-time writer. In 2013, she was awarded an MBE, and in 2022 an OBE. She lives in Yorkshire, plays bass and flute in a band first formed when she was sixteen, and works in a shed in her garden. She is an honorary Fellow of St Catharine's College, Cambridge, and served for four years as Chair of the Society of Authors. She also has a form of synaesthesia which enables her to smell colours. Red, she says, smells of chocolate.

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