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Looking After

Looking After

A Portrait of My Autistic Brother

Summary

'A beautiful, bracing gem of a book, quite unlike any other family memoir I’ve ever read' Polly Morland, author of A FORTUNATE WOMAN

'Beautifully written, erudite and important . . . Looking After is a love letter to an autistic brother and to family itself, and a reminder of the power of empathy to save lives' Christie Watson, author of THE LANGUAGE OF KINDNESS

'held me captive to the very last page. Wise, compassionate and compellingly told' Monica Ali, author of LOVE MARRIAGE

'This life-spanning memoir is an affecting and affectionate tribute' Bookseller, Editor's Choice

Meet Lionel, Caroline’s older brother. Born in the late 1940s, when little was known about autism, Lionel was considered a peculiarity. From the beginning, he was a silent child, oblivious to the people around him and intent only on playing with his toy trucks. By the time he turned four, doctors declared him ineducable and advised that he be institutionalised – a shockingly standard practise at the time.

No one could have predicted that Lionel would go onto music college and find his place in the world. With the help of his mother – who refused to send him away – Lionel lived a life that was certainly unusual but never dull. He had perfect pitch, could multiply three-figure numbers in his head, or work out which day of the week you were born on, the instant you told him your birthday.

But when Lionel’s mother dies, and shortly after he is diagnosed with cancer, his two sisters struggle to fill the void – to become Lionel’s caretaker and support him as they had promised their mother. Looking After is both a portrait of one autistic man's remarkable life, and a heart-rending story of how one family learnt to care for each other, to deal with loss and to be by each other’s side at the very end.

Reviews

  • A beautiful, bracing gem of a book, quite unlike any other family memoir I’ve ever read. Candid and tender in equal measure, incredibly moving but also lucid and life affirming, this is such an important book about familial love, about where and how it meets the imperfect world outside. Gripping too. Even though technically one knows from the outset what is going to happen, I found it hard to put down. By the closing pages, I felt I had grown to love Lionel too and that I would never forget him. Looking After is a triumph.
    Polly Morland, author of A FORTUNATE WOMAN

About the author

Caroline Elton

Caroline Elton was born in north London, the youngest child after her sister Liz and their older brother, Lionel, who was autistic. Originally trained as a teacher, she changed career direction and for the past 25 years has worked as a psychologist who specialises in supporting medical students and doctors. The author of Also Human: The Inner Lives of Doctors, Caroline was appointed as Associate Professor/Senior Adviser at Norwich Medical school in 2022. She is married, with three children, and still lives in north London.
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